10. Club Soda and Salt
He got it all out. The stain’s gone. Club soda and salt! –Larry
In season 3,Larry and Jeff invest in a restaurant. They must however find a new cook since theirs leave three weeks before the grand opening. They must now find a new chef and go to Ted Danson’s house to test his house chef but Larry feels the food is too saucy. Jeff spills coffee on a sofa and one of Larry’s friends uses club soda and salt to clean it. Cheryl befriends a tennis player who might or might not want to get with her and gives her a music tape. “Hey Brad… Larry’s in the car.” You also can’t give a wedding gift after a year and if not the couple won’t accept it. While the ending is too much even for Curb your Enthusiasm standards, it still is a great and really funny episode.
9. The Baptism
He’s not going to break into our house, he’s going to Monterey! -Larry
The first episode of the series I had ever watched, this episode will forever hold a place in my heart since it introduced me to the series. Larry and Cheryl are supposed to go to a Baptism but Larry believes that his plane tickets have been stolen and goes around the airport accusing strangers that he thinks stole his tickets claiming “I know what you did.” (Who does that?) This episode is hilarious from start to finish and also has a cameo from Mark Boone Junior from Sons of Anarchy.
8. The Reunion
You told the president of NBC to go fuck himself? –Jerry
This episode marks the first appearances of Jerry Seinfeld, Michael Richards and Jason Alexander on the show and while they all play caricatures of themselves it’s nice to see all of them interacting with Larry as he meets with all of them to try and get them to do The Seinfeld reunion in order to get Cheryl back. Julia Louis Dreyfus had already appeared in the episode The Wire of Season 1 and it’s always great to see her back. Larry also gets in a biff with the president of NBC, who gives him not so good basketball tickets and ignores his call at the game. Larry then go tells him to go fuck himself, something he must apologize for so that the show doesn’t get cancelled. Brilliant stuff from start to finish.
7. Kamikaze Bingo
Bingo! Bingo! Bingo! Bingoooo! –Larry
One of the best episodes of the fifth season, Larry rightfully believes that Ruth, the person in charge of bingo at the nursing home is cheating and is in cahoots with someone he despises. He also pushes his Japanese friend Yoshi to try and kill himself after calling his father a chicken and saying that he wasn’t a real kamikaze pilot. Larry must now apologize to Yoshi and beat his friend Kevin Nealon at bingo.
6. The Ski Lift
What are you fucking nuts? –Larry
One of the all time best, The Ski Lift has everything. Larry and Jeff must befriend the head of a kidney transplant consortium so they invite him and his daughter (who is a religious nut) for the weekend to go skiing. Larry and Jeff exchange wives for the weekend and from there on out it’s a ridiculous over the top ski trip that ends in a hilarious manner that only Larry David could get away with. And as you’d expect, it doesn’t end well for Larry.
5. The Larry David Sandwich
Instead of ordering a Ted Danson, people go in and order a Larry David, what’s the difference?-Larry
A sandwich is named after Larry David and it’s awful. So what does Larry do? He attempts to switch places with Ted Danson who has a much better sandwich. Larry is also changed by a near death experience and learns a truth about his father. This episode is classic curb.
4. The Ida Funkhouser Memorial
He’s not my best friend! -Larry
Marty Funkhouser looses his mother (this is an apparent goof since in the season 4 episode The Weatherman, Marty mentions at his testimonial that his mother passed away 10 years ago) and puts a memorial for her on the road with flowers. Marty owes Larry 50 bucks for a bet and pulls a 50 dollar bill from his shoe and Larry refuses to take it but eventually takes the money. He tries to get rid of the money but nobody will take it, which leads him to steal flowers from Ida’s memorial and it naturally blows up in his face. This episode is hilarious and Marty becomes one of the funniest supporting characters here.
3. Larry Vs. Michael J. Fox
He will be gay. He’s pre-gay. –Larry
This may as well be the final episode of the series since the show is in indefinite hiatus (although I truly believe that Larry will do a season 9 and end it after 9 seasons just like Seinfeld did). Michael J. Fox is truly hilarious as Larry David’s rival, whom Larry believes is using his Parkinson’s disease as an excuse to torment him for shushing Fox at a clubhouse. He also gives a controversial gift (to put it nicely) to Jennifer’s son who might turn out to be gay. Such a hilarious episode and if this is really the series finale, then Larry goes out like a pro.
2. The Anonymous Donor
I’m Anonymous! I’m Anonymous! I’m Anonymous! Larry David is Anonymous! –Larry
Larry has a wing in a museum named after him, but is appalled when he is upstaged by an anonymous donor that turns out to be none other than Ted Danson who tells a select few that he donated the wing. Ted and Cheryl become close friends, which leads him to tell her a secret about Jeff. The episode also marks the first appearance of Leon and also gives us a cameo of Ken Jeong (who plays Chang on Community). This entire episode is a true gut buster.
1.The Black Swan
Let me explain something to you, you moron. Swan killers leave. People who aren’t swan killers, stay! –Larry
This episode is a half hour of comedic gold. Larry kills a swan at a golf club and it just so happens to be Mr. Takashi’s pet. He is also blamed for the death of the world’s slowest golfer. “It may have been an accident, but you’re a murderer.” Larry also protests tips at the clubhouse, gets on the bad side with the stonemason and gets a bad reputation at the golf course. This episode is pure genius and things don’t work out well for Mr. David as usual. It’s by far the best of the series and it’s incredibly funny from start to finish.